Let me be honest with myself

Saw an interesting quote from For Today's singer "Some men act like boys; they are irresponsible and apathetic. Some men act like women; they are emotionally driven crowd followers." ...I find it divisive and inconsiderate to tear down someone based on gender just to get a point across...especially because Mattie's goal was to admonish godly men to step up. One thing that jumps out to me is that a boy will grow up and become a man...but a woman is a woman for the rest of her life. Does this mean women are uncontrollably emotional and more unstable than a "boy"? This flippant disregard for christian sisters that listen to for today and follow mattie's facebook is an attitude that is becoming highly encouraged in modern churches. I won't begin to list the "Be a man" conferences and books that are coming out but I keep asking myself...what are these "men" doing to encourage and lift up their wives/daughters/sisters in the Lord? Are ...

It's amazing how the longer you're on earth the less appreciative you can become of things like breathing, waking up every morning, and birthdays. I'm amazed to find that I'm 25 today and though I've only begun to live it's as if I've lived a couple of lives within this one. There are so many transitions that I've made in a short period of time but I would not have it any other way. Going from infant to child to teen to wife to mother and to what I am now...an adult with a loving husband, a beautiful daughter and a place to call home. Leading up to this birthday I hadn't been thinking about my life because we're transitioning from my hubby working in businesses to working at home and I feed him and Angel every day. It's been pretty thought/time consuming! A few things I've learned about life so far? Showing gratitude and granting forgiveness are the beginnings of peace in yourself God is real and loves us...no need to argue the finer poin...

A lot has been swirling in my mind lately. Just to list a few of the general topics Gender inclusivity/Gender equality in the church www.cbehouston.org Accountability between women in the church http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=titus%202:3-5\\&version=ASV Unschooling within a community "school" www.therealschoolhouston.org Northern Soul- and how to dance to it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzRgiGuGDmc Oh yeah and how to dread my own hair http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSzkXXvNqL0&feature=related While I feel like I'm somewhat in isolation due to my approach to well...life. Being out here on the fringes of society (relational wise) I have found love in unexpected places. As a devout christian I've accepted that the kingdom is within me because God's Holy Spirit is within me. So it's becoming more apparent to me that wherever I go the kingdom follows and if I serve and love everyone and everywhere I will begin to see the Lord move in mysterio...

It's amazing to remember that around this time two years ago I was writhing in pain trying to cope pretty unsuccessfully with my labor haha. Two years later and that long day seems like a dream. I wanted to take the time to write down my birth story in celebration of Angel's second birthday : ) 8:30am 1/16/09 I woke up crampy thinking maybe I was having false labor but felt really giddy that it might be time to finally get rid of my giant belly! I knew the drill and ate breakfast and took a shower to see if things would stop. Aaron was getting ready for work because we thought he could use the hours since he was taking paternity leave. The cramps didn't go away so I called my sister and my mom it was about ten and they came over to help me time the cramps and see if it's the real deal. Sure enough my sister began timing rushes on her Iphone app and things were consistent. I called my midwife and she said things sounded good and to drink some wine and rest as much as I c...

"Praise the Lord! Happy are those who fear the Lord. They are not afraid of evil tidings; their hearts are firm, secure in the Lord. Their hearts are steady, they will not be afraid." (Psalm 112: 1a, 7-8a) As far back as I can remember I've been emotionally unstable. I kid you not I was the little girl who cried or eyes watered for everything! My ultra sensitivity made me a good target in school and helped alienate me from having friends. I can literally count with my hands how many friends I had from k-12. Growing older that instability manifested in more angry/impatient forms making my marriage not so enjoyable for my hubby (who already struggles with ADD). I've had to grow and struggle with myself while my husband was thrown into the mix and many times I was fighting/resisting him when really I was just exacerbating things. He has been so faithful to me it's almost as if he's represented Christ and His faithfulness to me. The other day we had a disagreement...

DISCLAIMER:the terminology I use in this blog may be unsettling to some. This blog is about child birth and labor...you have been warned. Isaiah 1:18 "Come now, let us reason together," says the LORD." I feel like I need to say the above quote to women in the west. Let us reason together . Reason- a (1) : the power of comprehending, inferring, or thinking especially in orderly rational ways : intelligence (2) : proper exercise of the mind (3) : sanity Let us reason together about birth. Let us not be automatically divided but let us talk, debate, exchange:facts, science, logic, intuition, emotions of every kind and experiences. Let us engage the POWER of comprehending. But that's what I ask. Can we not reason together? I start this off in a somewhat general way. But really it boils down to people I know/have known and how birth has effected them negatively and positively. Where do I start when it comes to birthing babies? Well lets start with my mom. My mother had ...

I feel anxious. I know that true growth causes change but I have a hard time adjusting to change. Period. I bite Aarons head off when he changes plans or makes plans without me knowing. It's definitely a personal/controleverythingaroundme issue. God is uncomfortably uprooting this issue because I've asked Him to. Do you ever momentarily regret certain prayers? I do that a lot. I've gone through so much of my adult life feeling overwhelmed. Like the burdens assigned to me were simply too much. Like God why can't I be assigned with being too loving? Thats a burden that seems less uncomfortable/humiliating. I had enough to deal with being a teenager and being emo. Now I have to be emo as an adult too?! This probably doesn't make any sense but my last post really ties into it. I feel my flesh/ego suffering. I am realizing my weaknesses/issues and it seems too overwhelming to deal with. Quick story. So my dad told me to watch "Fat Sick and Nearly Dead" and I di...